As I sit in my room all I can think about is the loneliness. I've even locked my cat out behind that door. The only real company I have is a couple of pictures of my mom and some stuffed animals I've had since I was a little kid. It makes me kind of sad that I'm so alone. Yet I'm afraid, for some reason that door that simply separates me from the kitchen feels like a door that could do something else. I've never really been good at love or touchy feely crap. Even when I was a little kid I rejected physical contact, now... I don't know. Every-time someone tells me they love me or are there for me I instantly get mad. That is serious bull shit. There is no way people can ever be like that. I'm sick of the word love but at the same time I sit in my room and cry because I don't understand that feeling. No matter who I was dating, no matter how much I thought they meant to me, I always broke up with them. They always pissed me off after a while, it only took a week to piss me off, if that, and then another for me to get sick of pretending I felt something for them... am I doomed to be alone because of this?
No comments:
Post a Comment